These last couple weeks have been really great. I felt great! The little one was moving a lot and I loved it! I was getting a ton of stuff done, and then it hit...
I am not sure what to call it maybe a fluke but I have been exhausted. Like take multiple naps and still go to bed at 10 or 11 and wake up at 8:30 or 9 kind of exhausted. I have not been sleeping well and it gets progressively worse. I am also getting more nervous about the delivery/labor because there are a whole basket full of unknowns. Especially with my "condition", "issue" whatever you want to call it there is not a this is how it may go it could go all sorts of different ways which terrify the type A planner aheader me.
Anyway I have had to relax a lot. Because I can get extremely worked up about that and everything else that you could possibly think of. Needless to say a lot of prayers at all hours of the day have been offered.
It brings me peace when I literally have none left.
It keeps me sane and clear headed.
Although I can't control anything...
(except for my apartment... let's just say organized and reorganized repeat over and over again)
prayer is my peace mechanism right now and I know that's all I can do.
So the next four weeks I'm praying and waiting and organizing and cleaning.
because in the end all I want is a healthy, strong baby who we already love a million times over.